My past story of love. Threesome and polygamy problems.

When I arrived in this city I can possible tell you I was searching for love. Any kind of love. It was living a holiday for me, everyone was interesting, so I pretend that I was in the beach and every hot person who is nice to me is just for casual sex encounters, in the right moment. So in some moment of my life, a 2 meters tall transexual girl decided to be my girlfriend. After she decided I was her boyfriend, she use me to get some marriage and social acceptance from the losers. I hate this need for acceptance and the fact she needs to prove everyone something. They are all fucktards, so why the fuck she cares? I care for my thong in public, but not necessarily because I want acceptance or want to have friends or any bullshit alike. I make myself silent (when I can, never when I need to) to stay out of trouble, for fear of them, fear of the society, in other words I would prefer remain silent then confront their shits. I actually prefer stay away, it's safer. In some sense, being with her, a 2 meters tall transvestite was cool for escandalize the conservatives ones and people who doesn't understand freedom. I think she was very cool back then and I was happy to be with her. She was intelligent and had nice and bitter social comments. The conservatives are the fun side effects of our relationship. Now I know the truth, but in some period I think she really likes me. I was wrong.
Now I'm going to tell you how she tried to use me for her bad intentions and how her spells return against her, because she's only good in appearance and only when she wants something of you, after the magic fades she reveals herself as a fucking 30 years old male and a cruel devil. The story goes and she had a mysterious boyfriend who appears suddenly in her residence about 3am, or in the night owl hours. She tried to use me to exclude him of her life. Her reasons are she was tired of him and I think they doesn't even have a good relationship in the first instance. Well, I am not the jealous partner and he was damn cute. So she tried to make us fight or make him hate me, and always come to me saying he hate me, always and everyday she needs to reinforce the ideia that he hates me and he would beat me one day. I kind of love to wrestle with boys, so this make me feel even more happy. Happy to know my rival is in some sense hot and likes the same. Fighting. Well, at that point I had no clue about him wanting sex with me. I was thinking, in my innocence, that he only want to punch me or get a jiu jitsu fight betting money, and we were actually playing together already. So all her talks made me a little paranoic. For me it was not the first time that I  have an heterossexual friend who only wants to fight with me. Because I actually do some wrestling for fun. I'm a strong, hot. intelligent guy. If they do not want sex, they will want something. Young guys fall in love. Not exactly sexually. In general they desire to prove themselves they can beat me in a game, in a fight, in something. So, after sometime he decided to give me pleasure and it was nice, but surprisingly. I was suspicious about him, but suspicinous not meant reality. We make sex with some friends and she hates that and expelled him from her house. It was not our fault. We are living together since the beginning, but she was not happy. She was never happy. She does not want us to be happy. After she expelled him herself (because her plans to use me to expel him get wrong) I started to visit him after our work, but still living with. In some point she turned herself the devil, so jealous, with rules, and prohibitions, and constantly, relentlessly complaining. After a time of suffering and living in her devilish conditions I escape to my friend's house, to live with him for a time. Now, time has passed and we are nothing more than dust. This story looks like fictional. I am not living in my friend's bedroom anymore, we will never make sex again. He does not want me. I think he never want me and in that period he only wants to escape her too. He use me too. I think we escape together sometimes. I am grateful until now because he save me of a marriage, a monogamous marriage. A hell. He save me from that punishment. We still live in the same house, but now in separately rooms, great for me. She doesnt want to talk with me anymore. Neither with him. But I know, and thats hurts, I know one thing: she tried to use me to fill the void of him. She tried to use me to throw out other person. The person who she tried to kick out is one of my best friends now, and she was wrong for trying to do that. It was a bad action. Try to segregated someone. Even a abusive past partner. In the end she ended up alone and complaining more. The fact is it: she tried to use me to exclude someone who was a good person. She get her reasons, but I am not a tool. I will never be a someone's hand tool. Today I know that if he came and pledge to her to restart their relationship she actually will accept him again, because my relationship with her was only a tool so save her from him, too. Relationships are ironic. I love her but hate the devil who possessed her mind. I never want to end up my relationship with her, I just want to have two houses for love. Or more.

go for a beer young boy, you deserve it.

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Mes motivations, vive la liberté!

I got someone.

I got someone. Someone who doesn't want me, not exactly sexually, but we are together until now, he is my brother, was my lover and now we are another thing. We lived together, sleeped together for so long, then he treated me so bad and make some distance for a time and even after that we still in the same house, because I understand him in his long story short, sometimes everyone needs a time for themselves, and love is always demanding something. My friend and I, we never make sex again and it's alright. I actually dont want sex, only wrestling and jiu jitsu for me in a man with a man relationship is fine, because I like to fight and like violence, so having a best friend who likes your favorite sport was fulfilling and he is the best fighter in the city. I like being with a man to try and feel the strong and violence we can use for our own fun. Kind of BDSM ''perversion''. I dont think I can actually love a man, but I love my friend today even knowing he does not love me.  When I'm with someone else I'm kind of missing him. He's so handsome for me. But he is the kind of guy who only loves woman publicy, and men only sometimes, in night stands, secretly, in other words he is a hot trap, and I need to get away and make some distance from his intentions, because that confuses me in the sense I don't want sex, but company.

go for a beer young boy, you deserve it.

***

Please make a donation. I live in the third world and to continue any work, writing and artistic production, videos or images, I need your financial engagement to not end up in one of the mass exploitation factories of the Brazilian market dictatorship. Please!!!!! Any value counts, 50 reais (12,5 $) is little out there but it makes a big difference here.

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Mes motivations, vive la liberté!

Writing some poetry and others statements.

The urge to write. Normal day. Brendan awkwardly finds out Dany is still angy against him. He doesn't know why. It's because Brendan now lives (still lives) with her ex-boyfriend Daniel. Brendan himself was her boyfriend too. She makes angry commentaires and try to moral menace Brendan. She hates how Brendan and Daniel can live without her problems and paranoia. Why she thinks on that? Why she just can't let the people live their lives in their own ways. "I will expose them! Two gays in the closet". Who is she to think in doing that, in expose someone? It's just wrong. You can't live exposing everyone just for your and only yours personal issues and selfish behavior. I never was in closet. I'm a assexual guy, kind of depraved, pervert, but still assexual. My sexuality is completely linked to my obsession about sex and prostitution. I can't be a prostitué myself, but I should. Sometimes I fake it. For the gas money. I'm hot, but as a professional I'll be a failure and a mistake, because im not that hot, I think. I can't be a prostitute for living. Some people are. Instead of that I can work in a brothel, in cassinos... It's my dream actually. Flying to some cassino-land. Living a life full of lights, drugs and prostitution, but with money. And money, talking about the money, honey. I always thinking about all the money I spent with sex and alcohol. Today I'll be living fuck as rich if I was invested that shit in these past years. Now I have no money for nothing, just for paying the rent e surviving. Fuck it. Should someone save me for this sinking ship? Where is the international perverted society for financial suppport of alternative and against mainstream projects? I need money for some posters. In brazil cannabis is illegal. You have my hint. So give me a try.

go for a beer young boy, you deserve it.

***

Please make a donation. I live in the third world and to continue any work, writing and artistic production, videos or images, I need your financial engagement to not end up in one of the mass exploitation factories of the Brazilian market dictatorship. Please!!!!! Any value counts, 50 reais (12,5 $) is little out there but it makes a big difference here.

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Mes motivations, vive la liberté!

Lies and sex (do not open, graphic image!!!!). 18 +.

I'm always trying to be honest about lies. Today it's better without them, but in some ways not be confronted with the truth is like living in the shadow of the same light. I'm not being confronted about smoking weed or making polygamous sex, but if I'll it can be a lie, because for some people I actually don't do anything. Because if I said the truth, they will try to ruin myself. I can't confide any reality with people who are inserted in the fake reality and in the fake values, with all brainwashed ones. They are the danger. In the first opportunity they will stab me from behind. And this is not something I don't know or I can't talk about. Only saying the truth. They're fascists. They think anyone with deviant sexuality is not a default, but a crime. Sometimes the lie is the other situation, like not to smoke weed. Covering up your eyes, with shades, to truthly lying. My dick for hypocrisy. And for lovers too.

Sorry for the dick pic folks.

***

Please make a donation. I live in the third world and to continue any work, writing and artistic production, videos or images, I need your financial engagement to not end up in one of the mass exploitation factories of the Brazilian market dictatorship. Please!!!!! Any value counts, 50 reais (12,5 $) is little out there but it makes a big difference here.

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cc: 15578-6

****

Mes motivations, vive la liberté!